And I'm back...

Hello blog world people. Long time no see! I must confess I have been purposefully avoiding blogging lately because we had a bit of a scare (well maybe not that big of a deal in hindsight) and I just couldn't bring myself to post until I felt sure that everything would be OK.

I went in to see my RE and have my regular weekly ultrasound on Tuesday (7w2d). Our little blob (that's what I've decided it looks like currently) popped up immediately and we could see it's tiny heart flickering away. Dr. Lee measured everything and said the baby was growing right on track and had even tripled in size since my last visit! Then he decided he wanted to hear the heartbeat - imagine my excitement! After a minute or two he was able to bring it up on the screen and play the heartbeat. We could see the sound waves on the screen and Dr. Lee said it was beating at 130 beats per minute which was normal at that stage. Then for some reason he tried to hear the heart beat again and had a hard time getting it. He did eventually find it and again it was at 130bpm so that showed that it was beating at a consistent pace and not irregular. I thought everything was great but then Dr. Lee told me that he was concerned because the heart beat was so hard to find. I asked him why he would be concerned when we DID find it and could see it flickering the entire time anyways. He said that at this stage it shouldn't be so difficult to locate. I then asked him how big of a deal this is and he said that out of a scale of 1 to 10 he was at a 5/6 level of concern. Of course I freaked out and immediately started crying. All I heard in my mind at that point was "you may lose this baby". Dr. Lee said he wanted to see me again on Friday. Needless to say that was the longest 3 days ever!

7w2d

Pretty much everyone I talked to said that they thought Dr. Lee was being ridiculous. I heard many people tell me that their doctor doesn't even attempt to hear a heart beat until closer to 10 weeks because it's not uncommon to have a hard time finding it. People also told me to remember that the baby is only the size of a blueberry at this point so imagine finding a tiny heart inside something that small! Others simply said that if the baby is measuring on track and you can see the heart beating then you have nothing to worry about. Easier said then done!

Mike and I went in again on Friday (7w5d) and I was a total wreck, not sure what to expect. Dr. Lee immediately got to business and did the ultrasound. Up popped the baby and again he said that it looked great size wise, and that the heart was much easier to see this time. He then went to listen to the heart and found it immediately. This time it was beating a 164bpm which is great! But then he said that he is still concerned because my yolk sac is slightly larger then normal. I guess they like to see it no bigger then 7mm and mine is 6mm (though the average is 3-5mm). I asked him what that meant and he said that it could be nothing but that typically larger yolk sacs are indicators of miscarriages. Again, I lost it and began to cry hysterically. He then tried to calm me a bit by saying that he feels much better after this ultrasound then he did on Tuesday. He said that if he had to predict the likelihood of a bad outcome (which I'm assuming means miscarrying) after Tuesday he would have said 60%, but now its only 30%, with a 70% chance of a normal pregnancy (gee, thanks for that reassurance!). Finally, he said he wants me to come back on Tuesday, December 11th (so not the week coming up but the following week) and that he expects to see little arms and legs at that point. He said that if he sees that, then he believes everything will be fine and my chances for a normal pregnancy will go up to 90%. After he left the nurse stayed for a few minutes and told us that she really wouldn't worry that much because my yolk sac is still in the normal range and they see plenty of women with larger yolk sacs go on to deliver perfectly healthy babies.

7w5d - the circle shape is the "large" yolk sac

I must say that I am really beginning to think Dr. Lee is overly cautious. I'm not saying that I'd rather have a doctor who is too relaxed but I guess I'm just not feeling his bedside manner, so to speak. If I'm in the normal range why bring up all the scary what ifs? Of course a pregnant women, especially one who has gone through so much to even get pregnant, is going to freak out! At this point I'm still not 100% happy but I am trying to take it one day at a time and realize that whatever happens is out of my hands. I really don't see the need to worry since I am still in the normal range for yolk sacs. As far as I'm concerned, the baby is growing appropriately so I have every reason to believe it will continue to do so and develop little arms and legs. Also, it has a perfect heart beat that is consistent and regular. Now if it was growing slower then normal and measuring behind, or if it had an extremely low heartbeat then I might be more worried about this yolk sac issue. Also, Dr. Lee is obviously not too worried or he would have me come back in next week after several days have passed like he did this time. I doubt he would be super duper worried but yet wait 11 days to see me.

I will be seeing my OB/GYN on Tuesday for the first time since finding out I'm pregnant. I have been seeing her since I was 18 for all my regular women needs and I really like her. She has a calm demeanor to her that a worry wort like myself needs, but at the same time she doesn't sugar coat things if there is a problem. She just doesn't cause unnecessary worry. I doubt I'll be getting an ultrasound from her this early on but I want to tell her what has been going on and get her take on everything.

So anyways, that's why I've been away for a while.... Thoughts and prayers and good vibes are greatly appreciated! And I promise to post a belly update for weeks 6 and 7 tomorrow!!