I'm Alive and Well

First and foremost I want to say a BIG thank you to everyone who has reached out to me and shown support during this hard time. Whether it was here on my blog, or on TheBump.com, I was truly amazed at how many people cared and responded to my news. I honestly feel like all the kind words have helped me heal and move forward!

Since my last post wasn't exactly filled with good news I thought I'd check in with you guys and let you know that I am alive and well, not laying around crying myself into a depression...

It's been a few days since we got the news and since then I've had some time to think about some of the positives from this:

1. Hello Coffee, I've missed you!

2. Wine Wednesday with my girlfriends really is WINE Wednesday again!

3. Goodbye IF bloat! Since stopping my meds I have lost 8 pounds!

So, I plan on enjoying the next couple weeks until all of that is gone again and am remaining hopeful that next month will be THE month for me. 

Thanks!

Wish I Had Better News

Well, I guess I should just break the news. I'm not pregnant...

Yesterday was such a hard day that I just couldn't deal with this blog. But after a LONG night of sleep, I'm feeling better about everything. 

Mike and I went in at 10:00am yesterday for the beta blood work and I was so nervous. Strangely enough, I had a feeling I wasn't pregnant. Something in my gut told me it didn't work. But Mike kept reassuring me and all the nurses kept saying how they had high hopes for me so it was hard not to start believing them. Mike and I went out to get some breakfast afterward and then went home to wait for the news. They finally called around 1:30 with the sad news. I was surprisingly calm on the phone with the nurse, probably because I was in shock. But as soon as I hung up the phone I burst into tears. I laid there for a good 20 minutes in Mike's arms just crying. Once the tears finally stopped I fell asleep and napped for about an hour. After napping I felt a little better, I think it was finally sinking in.

Dr. Lee called me around about this time to personally tell me that he was so very sorry to hear that it didn't work this time. He said that even though I had a pretty high probability of it working, we knew there was still a chance that it wouldn't work.

Side note: I don't think I ever talked about this before. Dr. Lee has several little Tupperware containers in his office that are filled with beads. He uses this to demonstrate your odds. Since he categorized me in the best category due to my age and health, he used the container that said 70% on it. It had 100 beads in it: 30 of them were brown (which represents no pregnancy), 35 were pink (which represents a girl pregnancy) and 35 were blue (which represents a boy pregnancy). Since we had decided to transfer two embryos he randomly pulled out two beads, a pink and a brown. Then he pulled out two more beads, both blue. He did it again and got two brown. He did this ten times to show us that while most of the time we ended up with at least one baby, there were still some times that we ended up with two brown beads. In other words, no pregnancy.

Back to my story, Dr. Lee told me that he doesn't think there is anything wrong with me that we don't know about that would contribute to why it didn't work this time. He said that unfortunately, he thinks we just drew two brown beads this time and is hopeful that next time will be better. So I'm not going to wallow in sadness forever. Sure I am sad that I won't ever get to see what will become of those two precious embryos. But I have always said things happen for a reason so I am going to continue to believe that.

At this point the plan is that I am stopping all my meds (that is the silver lining) and waiting for good old Aunt Flo to arrive. Once she does I will notify Dr. Lee and we will begin our next transfer cycle. I'm hopeful that October will be THE month!

Tomorrow....

Well folks, the horrendous/torturous 2WW is almost over. Yup, at this time tomorrow Mike and I will be getting ready to go see Dr. Lee for our beta test which will determine if I am pregnant or not. I have managed to avoid POAS this far and I think I can make it one more day.

The plan for today is to clean the house from top to bottom to hopefully pass the time and keep my mind occupied because it's only 9:20am and the day is already dragging! Fortunately we are going to be having friends over tonight to have a How I Met Your Mother party for the season premiere, so that should help me keep busy also.

If I am pregnant, I'm not sure I'll be able to keep it a secret for long, so I'm sure you'll all know. However, if you don't hear from me for a while, it's probably not a good sign. Any happy thoughts/good vibes etc... are greatly appreciated! 

Well, that's about it for now. Hopefully you'll be hearing from me soon!

It's Been A Week...

One whole week!! At this time last week Mike and I were heading home with two little embryos inside me - what a crazy thought! Only 5 more days to go! I am trying to fill my days so that I don't end up sitting around twiddling my thumbs. Today I am going out with some girlfriends for dinner and drinks (though I'll be having a "mocktail"). Tomorrow I am going to make orange marmalade and apple butter with my mom at her house. Saturday I will be hanging out at my mom's house again but my sister and nieces will also be there for a family BBQ. Then on Sunday, Mike and I will be going to his parent's house to help them finish cleaning out their garage.

I am also very excited to announce that my long list of medicine is getting shorter and shorter as we speak. I am now down to a prenatal and baby aspirin every day, Crinone Gel every morning, a shot of Progesterone every night, and a shot of Estrogen every third night. Reading that back to myself, it does still look like a good amount of medications but compared to what I was taking it seems like a walk in the park.

In other news, I've been thinking a lot about my blog and what will happen when the day comes that I am pregnant. I'm actually really surprised at how much I enjoy blogging. It's been comforting for me and in a way its like a release. It's like I have so much going on inside me and blogging allows me to let go of that. I know that I definitely want to continue blogging once I'm pregnant. I'm just not sure if I should create a new blog or continue on this one and let it evolve into something else. This blog was created to document my infertility and my struggles to get pregnant. I'm not kidding myself into thinking that I have tons of followers, or even one follower that regularly reads all my posts. I just worry that if start to blog about my pregnancy it might hurt some of the readers who are still struggling with their fertility. Oh well, I am getting ahead of myself here since I don't even know if I am pregnant or not yet. I guess I'll figure that out when the time comes.

Well that's about all that is happening with me right now. Thanks for listening to my rambling!

Pregnancy Symptoms Or Crazy?

I am now 4dpFET and this waiting is HARD!! It's way too early to have any pregnancy symptoms and I know that....right? So why am I over analyzing everything I'm feeling?? As I said, this waiting is HARD! Well, either I am preggo or I am crazy but never the less, here is how I am feeling so far:

• Sore breasts - Definitely still feeling sore but not too bad.
• I'm always thirsty - Anyone who knows me knows that it typically takes me forever to finishvmy drink, let alone get refills!!
• I'm crazy gassy - Eeewwww, this one is gross!
• Upset stomach - I'm still enjoying food but nothing seems to be sitting well with me and unfortunately it's all running through me!

I've also definitely begun to have food cravings and aversions (though I've always been someone who gets strong cravings so it could very well just be me thinking I have a reason to be craving things now). Anyways, here is what I've been obsessed with lately:

• Milk shakes and milk (specifically strawberry flavored) - I have never liked milk, not even as a child, so this one is beyond me!
• Diet Coke (but only if its a fountain drink) - I no longer like soda from a can, it doesn't taste very carbonated to me.

So that's how I'm feeling right now. 8 days left to go until I'll find out if this is all in my head or not...

INSANITY

Alright, this is sooooo not good. I am only 1dpFET (1 day post FET) and I am going crazy thinking about signs of pregnancy! How am I supposed to last a couple more weeks?? I should have known this was going to happen considering I am a self diagnosed hypochondriac. The funny thing is I have always been that person who listens to potentially pregnant women going on and on about possible symptoms and have thought to myself "you are crazy, it's way too soon to be feeling symptoms!". I never should have judged these women because I am now one of them! So yes, I am fully aware that I am crazy but never the less I woke up this morning with crazy sore boobs! Dr. Lee said that implantation of the embryos will occur within 24 hours of the transfer so those little guys (or girls) are already sticking or they aren't...

Other then that, I am very ready to be done with bed rest. Don't get me wrong, it's been nice to get to lay around and have Mike wait on me hand and foot but I am ready to get up and walk around. It's not like I want to go run a marathon or anything, but I'd like to walk around a little! Mike is being so protective of me too, which is sweet. But seriously, he caught me walking downstairs to get ice cream from the fridge and he nearly ripped my head off! "What part about bed rest don't you understand?!?!", he practically yelled. I guess I'd rather have a husband who cares about me and our potential babies then one who doesn't. I just feel so cooped up! Also, Mike sucks at knowing what I like to munch on. I asked him to get me some snacks together before he left to go back to work and he brought me a bag of tortilla chips (sooo not my type of chip but furthermore he didn't even bring salsa or any other dip) and grapes! Ugh, I need to be back on my own feet pronto! And I'm not even going to comment on the mess in the kitchen because I knew that was going to happen.

Finally, I feel like karma has paid me a visit because I couldn't keep my big mouth shut about how the PIO shots haven't been hurting me. Yes, I am definitely feeling it now. It all started 3 nights ago when I said that I bled a little as Mike pulled out the syringe. The next night the shot itself actually hurt and I thought Mike must have hit a nerve or something. Well, last night I bled quite a bit again. I don't know if Mike is just starting to run out of places to stab me so maybe he is hitting past injection spots that are still sore? And as I was laying in bed this morning I happened to rub around the injection area and felt a decent size bump under my skin. I'm actually nervous for my shot tonight and am praying that it doesn't hurt or bleed!! I really hope that women out there who are blessed to be able to get pregnant on their own appreciate how lucky they are! I just keep reminding myself of what my sister always tells me, after all I've gone through pregnancy is going to be a breeze!

Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise!

The day is finally here! After all we've been through in last few months we are officially PUPO (Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise)!!

I was so nervous/anxious/excited/every emotion last night. In fact, I woke up about every couple hours and then couldn't go back to sleep after 5:00am. So I just laid there in bed, read a little, played on my phone etc... Finally around 9:00am I was allowed to wake up Mike (DO NOT attempt to wake him up before his predetermined time, it's not pretty). Once we were up and ready to go I took my Valium and we headed off to the surgery center. I have never taken Valium before and wasn't sure what to expect but I found that it just made me peacefully relaxed. Mike kept laughing at me and said my response time was slower when he was talking to me but I didn't notice anything.

Once we arrived at the surgery center we went up to the embryologist office and were let into one of the transfer rooms. The room was nice and peaceful. It was painted in a dark gray and was dimly lit. There was a noise machine playing the sounds of the ocean and there was a comfy chair next to the table for Mike to sit in. I was actually surprised at how casual the place was about everything. All they did was ask my name and birth date, they didn't even ask to see ID. For all they know I could have been some random crazy person stealing someone else's baby. Although, I guess my doctor was the one to actually do the transfer so he would have realized if it wasn't me, but still... Both Mike and I signed a consent form and had to initial for acknowledging that due to our younger age we are at higher risk of both embryos implanting which would result in multiples. The embryologist also went over the status of our embryos and gave us a picture of them!! He said both of the embryos were really good quality, one was grade A and the other was grade B. He explained that this grading system is actually pretty old and not as relevant as it once was because there are so many other things they test on now, but for whatever reason they still grade the embryos that way. He also told us that just because one is graded as a B doesn't mean it will have a higher chance of having problems if it takes, so that we shouldn't worry about anything like that. Overall he said we have great embryos!

 Once we signed everything they left Mike and I alone so I could undress from the waist down and get onto the table. It's so funny to think how I used to dread my annual appointment with my OB/GYN. After the last few months with Dr. Lee, undressing and getting into those stirrups feels like a daily routine to me! Then Dr. Lee came into the room and pretty much got right to business. He turned on the ultrasound machine which was actually hooked up to a big screen TV on the wall so we were able to watch everything. First he did a quick trial transfer which just means he practiced putting the catheter in to make sure it went in smoothly. Once he did that and felt that everything was OK he sent the nurse to go get our embryos from the lab. She came back in with a tiny tube and said our embryos were in it - it was so surreal! As Dr. Lee began inserting the tube through the catheter I could actually see it on the TV. Once he got to where he thought was the best location for implantation he told me to slow my breathing (I guess I was breathing pretty heavily) and then he released both embryos into my uterus. I actually saw it! It looked like a little shooting star shoot out and then it just stopped and stayed in place. It was so crazy! Mike and I were squeezing each other's hands so hard I swear I must have been cutting off his circulation! Dr. Lee took a couple different ultrasound photos from different angles of the embryos and I was going to ask if we could have a copy but I totally forgot in all my excitement. I'll have to try and remember to ask him for a copy later. After that they left Mike and I alone and told me to stay in place for 10 minutes. Then we were allowed to go home.

So now I am home, in bed resting. I have to be on pretty strict bed rest for the next 48 hours. Dr. Lee said basically all I can do is get up to go to the bathroom. It kinda sucks being confined to the bed but at least Mike is home with me today to keep me company (though I doubt he's very excited to be watching all seasons of Keeping Up With The Kardashians on Netflix with me). Tomorrow he has to go back to work so I'll just make sure he makes me breakfast before he leaves and then he will come home for lunch to get me something to eat. I think I'll be sending him to rent some movies tonight... I also already suckered him into going to get me a chocolate malt from Sonic as a celebration for being PUPO!!

Now the hard part begins: waiting! I'm trying to stay positive and think good thoughts. At this point I'm not even going to try and convince myself that I will be OK if I don't end up pregnant this time around. I'm already so over the moon with the idea of those two little ones inside me. It's going to be heartbreaking if this doesn't work. So I guess all I can do is pray for the best and see what happens.

Tomorrow Is The Big Day!

I just spoke to one of the nurses from my clinic and they gave me the good news: we are scheduled to do the embryo transfer at 11:45am tomorrow!! So I will be taking a Valium at 10:45am and will be checking into the surgery center at 11:30am. Mike is off from work tomorrow so he will of course be with me the entire time, thank God. Words cannot describe how incredibly excited/anxious I am for this.

As I wrote yesterday, I have been so overwhelmed thinking about all this that the last two days have literally resulted in me accomplishing nothing all day. Thank God I am not working right now because Lord knows what my manager would think of my productivity! On the flip side though, I wonder if not working is part of why I have so much time on my hands to let my mind wander... Either way I am determined to make the most of today for several reasons. First, I actually do have some things that need to be taken care of before my 48 hours of bed rest begins. I know that Mike will take care of all the necessary things but laundry, cleaning and those sorts of things will probably be left for me once I am able to be up and about again. So i figure it's probably best that I get everything as tidy as can possibly be. Another reason I am trying to busy myself today is that I have pretty much laid around the house the last 2 days and found it really hard to go to sleep last night as a result. You know when you are sick and in bed for so long that you start to be uncomfortable in bed? That was me last night. I really don't want to be miserable for the next two days of bed rest so I am attempting to wear myself out today in the hopes that I will crash tonight and be comfortable tomorrow and the following day in bed.

Today I will be taking the last of my daily dose of Dexamethasone and instead will now be starting Doxycycline twice daily and Medrol once a day for 4 days. I am still taking the Baby Aspirin and PreNatal Vitamin daily also. Today is day 4 of the Crinone Gel and it just keeps getting more and more gross! I'm used to the leakage so that's not really a big issue but apparently I've come to a point now where there is build up of gunk inside me so when I wipe I am seeing gross yellowish clumps coming out! Eeewww! Thankfully I happened to read from one women that this is normal or else I would have probably freaked out since I tend to be of the mindset that its not normal to have unusual stuff coming out of you... Other then that I am still plugging away with the nightly PIO shots and Delestrogen shot every 3rd night. I must say that I am pleasantly surprised with the PIO and want to set the record straight for any women who is scared to be starting these shots. For me, there hasn't been any pain so far. I have been on the PIO for a week now and have not felt any soreness in the muscle or any bumps near the injection site. The worst thing to happen so far was last night when Mike gave me the injections he must have hit a blood vessel or small vein as he pulled out the needle because i bled a little afterwards. At first I was afraid that he did the injection wrong but he said he aspirated the needle before injecting it so I think we're ok. Anyways, like I said so far everything is good. Maybe it's still too soon to have any of those side effects but as of right now I am perfectly happy to continue taking these shots.

I'll be back tomorrow once I get home and wear off the Valium for an update with all the details about how the transfer went. I've seen in some other people's posts that they were given pictures of their embryos so I'm really hoping our RE will do the same. It will be baby's (or babies') first picture!

How Do You Focus On Anything Else?

It is two days until our FET and I am finding it impossible to think or do anything else at all! I literally feel like all I want to do all day is update posts on TheBump.com, update my blog, read other IF blogs, browse Babies-R-Us online etc... 

I am terrified that I am getting so excited about this and I don't know how I am going to handle the news if I don't end up getting pregnant this time around. On the one hand I want to be positive but I also want to watch out for my mental health. The thing is, how do you not get your hope up? That's the shitty part about infertility - it's a mental fuck! Excuse my language, I don't normally talk this way but there really is no other way to put it. Not only is it physically insane what your body goes through, and emotionally draining because of all the crazy hormones running a muck in your head, but you begin to feel like it has to work or else what was the point of it all?!?! Surely all of the hard work I've gone through must be for something, must result in something, right? I don't even know how I am going to get through tomorrow, let alone sleep tomorrow night! 

Well that's about it for now. I'm sure I will update you tomorrow on how stir crazy I will be feeling!

A Whole Lot Of Gross!

Today I started using Crinone Gel and will be taking it every morning for the next month or so (assuming i get my BFP this time around). Only one word describes the experience: NASTY! It is a progesterone supplement that is meant to help aid in the implantation process. It comes in a little applicator, almost like a tampon, and is filled with goopy gel. It's pretty easy to insert, just stick it up there and squeeze. But it is such a strange feeling as it squirts up there (yes, I am going there)!! I suppose in the big picture sense it isn't bad. After all, it's not like I'm stabbing myself with another needle or anything. I just hope I don't have to deal with the seemingly common "leakage" issue (YUCK!!!). My nurse said to take it every morning because as I walk about throughout the day the movement of my body will actually help the gel coat the inside and absorb, lessening the likelihood of it leaking. If I were to apply it at night and then just lay around the house and sleep then it would accumulate and that's when it leaks. So today I helped my in-laws clean out their garage and so far no leakage, yay!

I also started Progesterone injections last night. I thought I was prepared for this shot since I've been taking Delestrogen for a couple weeks now and it is also a thick oil. But boy was I wrong! This PIO stuff is T-H-I-C-K!! Pulling it into the syringe was even hard because of how thick it was. I didn't feel anything as Mike injected it (it also goes in my upper butt/hip area) but it did take a long time to inject since it was so thick. As per our usual butt shot routine, we rubbed the injection area for a couple minutes afterwards and I have yet to feel any pain. Only time will tell though...

In other news, Mike and I have been having a lot of hypothetical conversations lately about the chances of us getting twins since we have agreed to transfer in two embryos. I must say the more we talk about it, the more positive we are about the whole idea and actually kind of excited about it, if that's even possible. Mike even keeps talking about things we will need to buy two of if we do have twins, as if it's actually going to happen and he is beginning to plan for it! While it is fun to daydream though, it does start to feel overwhelming when I really start thinking about it. I think it's the kind of thing that you shouldn't worry about until it happens though, and then just take it a day at a time... 

In the meantime, we are trying to enjoy this week before the big transfer day. We had friends over for a BBQ/pool party yesterday, we've been going to see lots of movies and going out to restaurants... I'm feeling so excited and hopeful, I just hope i don't feel unbelievably crushed if it doesn't work this month. I'm trying to not get my hopes up but how can you not? 

That's it for now. I hope you all are having a great weekend!

All Systems Are A Go!

I had what I am calling my "final" monitoring appointment today with Dr. Lee. I say final because I have officially been given the green light for our frozen embryo transfer on next Thursday, September 13th! At today's ultrasound my uterine lining was a perfect 9 triple layer (whatever that means), so I guess that means this oven is ready to bake a little bun!!

Once I got dressed we moved into the "comfy room", as I like to call it, to discuss how many embryos we wanted to transfer- basically his office/consultation room instead of one of the exam rooms. We explained that while we would obviously prefer to only have one baby at a time, we are OK with the idea of having twins but we really don't want to have triplets or more so we are nervous about putting in two embies. But at the same time, I know the odds of getting a positive is higher with two so that in itself is a compelling argument for putting in two embies. After much discussion about odds we decided to leave it up to fate. As it turns out, half of the 10 embryos we have were frozen in pairs, while the other half were frozen individually. We are going to thaw one of the pairs and if both survive the thaw then we will put both embies in and let God decide. If, however, only one embie survives the thaw then that will be all we put in and pray that it takes. Mike and I both left the office feeling really comfortable with our decision so i guess only time will tell what is going to happen.

Today's appointment was also another jam packed visit as far as information goes. I got my official schedule and it was filled with tons of different colored highlighters which of course gave me an anxiety attack just looking at it. I'm just happy that it is broken down by day so it's pretty much dummy proof.

Here is a breakdown of what I will be doing over the next week to prepare for the transfer:

*Continue taking 1mg Dexamethasone, 1 baby Aspirin, 1 Prenatal Vitamin Daily. Also continue injecting .4cc Delestrogen every 3rd night.

Tonight: Inject .5ml HCG

Saturday: Begin injecting 1ml Progesterone (Ethyl Oleate) nightly

Sunday: Begin using Crinone Gel (gross gel that I have to insert vaginally!!!) every morning

Tuesday: Inject .1ml HCG

Wednesday: Begin taking Doxycycline 100mg twice daily and Medrol 16mg once a day for 4 days

Thursday(Transfer Day): Take Valium 10mg 1 hour prior to transfer. **Bonus I actually get to eat and drink whatever I want prior to the transfer, unlike prior to the egg retrieval! I will be on strict bed rest the rest of Thursday and all of Friday, only allowed to get up to go to the bathroom.

Friday: Inject .1ml HCG

Monday: Inject final 1ml HCG

After all that I will continue to take the Delestrogen shot every 3rd night, as well as the nightly Progesterone shot and daily Crinone Gel. I will also continue taking the baby aspirin and prenatal vitamins through the first few months of pregnancy, I believe. 

I am scheduled to go back to see Dr. Lee on Tuesday, September 25th to have my beta test which will tell them if I am pregnant. I have decided that I don't think I want to take a home pregnancy test prior to this appointment. For a while I was thinking that I might want to POAS (pee on a stick) a day or two before so that I could prepare myself if the results are negative but I just don't know that would make me feel any better. Knowing myself, I would end up thinking that maybe the test was wrong and give myself false hope to only be crushed again when the beta came back negative. No, I think I am going to wait and let the doctor tell me yes or no.

I'm feeling really good right now, very excited. I know that this isn't a for sure thing and there is a real chance that we won't get pregnant from this cycle (though I am trying to be positive). But I think I'm just happy to be seeing the fruits of all our labor, so to speak. It's like we've gone through so much with all the injections and stimming, all the appointments and the egg retrieval, all the pain I went through with OHSS after the egg retrieval etc... Then we had to be delayed and wait a month. I understand it was for the best but it's so exciting to be finally reaching the end of this cycle one way or another. I read and post a lot on the infertility board on TheBump.com and it has literally kept me sane over the last few months. I have honestly learned so much from all the amazing women there and have genuinely begun to care about their stories and whats happening with them. But its been so hard to see women who I remember starting their cycle after me already pregnant and moving on while I've been stuck in this holding pattern. Don't get me wrong, I am totally happy for them and don't begrudge their experiences at all especially since I know a lot of them have been at this much longer then me. I guess I'm just trying to say that I am sooooo ready for this Thursday! 

Well, I guess that's all for now. If there is anyone out there who actually made it through this ridiculously long post, please please please keep your fingers crossed for me that this works!! Thanks :)

We're Back!

I'll start this post with an amazing photo I took of The Grand Canyon a few days ago... Seriously, it's breathtaking, isn't it?!?!

Mike and I drove home today from our mini vacation in Arizona/Nevada and I can't say enough how happy I am to be sleeping in my own bed tonight. Don't get me wrong, I had a blast over the last few days but my back is killing me... We first drove to Goodyear, AZ Friday night and stayed with a couple friends through Tuesday morning. We mainly lazed around, swam, ate, and laughed. It was great to catch up and just relax. Then Tuesday morning Mike and I said goodbye and headed off to see The Grand Canyon. It was kind of an impromptu stop so we didn't get to see as much as we would have liked but I'm still glad we decided to go (even though it was a LONG drive).

From The Grand Canyon we drove to Laughlin, Nevada to stay for a couple days. Neither of us had ever been to Laughlin and while we had heard that it is "an older person's Las Vegas" we thought it might be nice to get in a few days of gambling plus it cut our drive home into shorter drives. Well, the casino definitely wasn't what we were hoping it would be but we had fun lounging by the pool instead.

Finally, though, it was time to head back home and face reality. I have another appointment tomorrow afternoon with Dr. Lee to check how the thickness of my uterine lining is coming. I hope there is some progress and that Dr. Lee thinks we are still on for the FET on Thursday. Yup, a week from today we will officially be PUPO (Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise)! Speaking of all this infertility business, this was my first time traveling while having to take my meds. It wasn't that big of a deal since most days I just have to swallow a couple pills but I did have to take 2 shots throughout the trip. By now I am used to quickly mixing up the meds so the hassle was more just having to lug around everything and remember to take the shot. At home you get into a routine every night but when you are out on vacation  it's very easy to forget... 

Well, I just thought I'd check in and say hi since it's been a while. I'll update you with any news after tomorrow's appointment.