Anxious...

Tomorrow is my third and (hopefully) final Beta test and the nerves are starting to sink in. It will have been 6 days since Beta #2 so it's been a while (in IF land anyways) since I've seen Dr. Lee. I know that I had good, strong numbers but I can't help but be worried that this third time it won't be where it needs to be.  The rational part of me says to calm down because I'm still feeling as pregnant as I can be at this point, I'm still having real pregnancy symptoms, but of course I still worry.

Sometimes I worry that I jumped the gun in believing that everything is going to be OK with this pregnancy. This is obviously my first time ever being pregnant so I don't have any history of miscarriages or any reason to believe that I may miscarry. But then I constantly read about women who start bleeding and miscarry at the same point I'm at (sometimes even several weeks farther along then me). And I also read about women who go in for their first ultra sound only to find out there's no heart beat and that the baby just stopped developing several weeks back. The list goes on and on! Mike keeps telling me that everything will be OK and that I'm already being a good mom to the little baby by worrying/careing about him/her. I guess I'll just feel better once I see it's little heart beating away on our ultra sound Monday.

Anyways, I have now known for an entire week that I am pregnant and it's definitely not the beautiful glowing experience that you see in movies. Don't get me wrong, I am loving every minute of knowing there's a baby in there and it's really not all that bad. I guess I just wasn't aware of some of the symptoms...

• For example, did you know that approximately 30% of pregnant women get stuffed up noses. Guess who is in that 30%? Yup, me! I am constantly stuffed up and it's so bad at night that I have to double up my pillows or I wake up because I can't breath! 

• Also, apparently progesterone can cause shortness of breath in the first trimester as your body adjusts to all the excess amounts. Well, add the PIO shots to the already heightened amount from pregnancy and my body is pretty much overwhelmed with progesterone, causing me to huff and puff with almost any activity. 

• Thankfully my nausea isn't too bad. I feel a little queasy for the first 30 minutes after I wake up but it's not anything that makes me think I'll actually throw up. And if I let myself get too hungry then I'll feel the nausea again, so I'm just learning to eat lots of smaller meals throughout the day. I haven't had any real cravings or aversions yet, more just specific ideas of what I do and do not want when we are trying to decide what to eat.

• And speaking of eating, some of the things I used to really like just don't taste right anymore. We had Chinese food the other night and it just wasn't the same. It's not that I couldn't stomach it, it just tasted different. And recently I sent Mike to get me a dipped cone from McDonald's but when I tried to eat it the chocolate tasted funky to me, so much so that I made Mike eat off all the chocolate and then I just ate the ice cream. And I've noticed that spicy flavors are like 10 times spicier to me now!

• Lastly, I have been pretty surprised at how emotional I get over things. I've always been an emotional person and cry at sappy movies blah blah blah (I once even cried from a movie preview!!). So I thought I already had that part handled and that it wouldn't be much different when I was pregnant. WRONG! I cry at the drop of a hat now, both happy and sad reasons set me off. And it's not just happy/sad emotions that are heightened, my anger is at an all time high. The littlest thing can set me off and make me want to punch someone!

Oh the joys of pregnancy!